Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I didn't notice because vodka
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
