I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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