i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Randomize
