My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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