Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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