I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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