make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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