I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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