Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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