come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
My ATM looks so different sober.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Randomize
