i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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