fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
