At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
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