New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Randomize
