wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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