Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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