she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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