I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
