oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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