Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
