I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
