doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Soap is not a condiment
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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