he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Randomize
