Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
