you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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