thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
