You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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