My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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