Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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