last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
