i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Randomize