so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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