He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
