I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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