too bad you live with your parents still
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Randomize
