I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
