It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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