Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
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