I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
