GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
you traded sex for a burrito?
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
