You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
