I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
