ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
My nipple is on Facebook.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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