U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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