Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Randomize
