Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
bring money and cleavage
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Randomize
