holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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