Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Randomize
