If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
