She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
